squeequeg | Conversations with the Muse

Scene: This morning, around 11:30ish.
Me: *typity typity, working along*
Muse: Hey.
Me: Hm? Oh, hi. I'm still working on that last thing of yours. I finally figured out how to get that scene with the escape and the jumping-out-the-window bit. It's gonna look great.
Muse: Yeah, that's fine, just fine. Look, I got something new for you. Here's the idea.
Me: Huh. It's kind of cool . . . but hasn't it been done?
Muse: Not like this.
Me: Oh. Oh, wow . . . but um, I'm kind of at work . . .
Muse: You can send it in for your writers' group.
Me: But I'd have to have it ready in a week and a half -- and there's work -- and

sal_sal is coming and I haven't cleaned --
Muse: *SLAP* Look at me when I am talking to you!
Me: Ow!
Muse: Thank you. Now here's some plot potential to go with that idea.
Me: But -- but I was gonna send "Deserving Drawer Story" to the group! I tweaked it and everything!
Muse: *SLAP* Pay attention, bitch!
Me: OW!
Muse: Are you paying attention? Good. Here's another cool idea. See how it works in with the rest?
Me: . . . owie . . . hey, that is cool. But look, I've been being all productive and shit on the novel, and I don't want to break that rhythm, and --
Muse: *raises hand* Do you see this?
Me: *cringe* yes.
Muse: Good. Now here's that bit of mythology you remembered correctly. It fits right there.
Me: Does it? No . . . it's kind of like this instead . . . and then that's here . . . hey, here's a plot!
Muse: This will make a fabulous opening sentence.
Me: Well, maybe. As a jumping-off point it might work.
Muse: Are you questioning me?
Me: No! I mean, not till the next draft.
Muse: Good. Get to it.
Me: . . . first . . . sentence. Outline. And here's a scene . . . I can mention this, maybe I'll cut it later . . . how would you say this in French . . .
Muse: That's what I like to see. Oh, and this doesn't get you out of the novel, by the way. You've still got sixteen chapters to go before the really cool death scene, and I want it all to be worth my while.
Me: . . . yeah, got it . . .
Muse: I'll make popcorn.