squeequeg | On the moon we have evolved beyond the need for Homeland Security.

So apparently the Mooninites invaded Boston today.

I have mixed feelings about this.

On the one hand, this is a textbook example of overreaction. The devices in question were just light-up boards, they'd been there a while, and the image of Err (or Ignignokt) flipping people off should have been a clue. (Or maybe Boston police don't watch Aqua Teen Hunger Force.) It's also an example of how frightened we've become that a few things that were, in essence, toys can shut down substantial parts of a city. In hindsight, a lot of it does seem like people who were so gung-ho to stop the next Terrist Thret that they didn't check to see what they were looking at.

On the other hand, when I first heard the preliminary reports about devices being found under bridges and in T stations, I was scared. And after learning that it was just a marketing stunt, I feel ashamed of that fear. It's similar to how if a friend jumps out at me wearing a mask and I freak out -- even for a moment -- I'm still kind of pissed off afterward. Neither saying that it was meant as a joke nor pointing out that the mask wasn't even realistic helps with that feeling of angry humiliation.

Perhaps it's just my way of defending that first, visceral reaction, but I would still like to find the marketing exec who okayed this and slap him for a while. And then I'd like to slap whoever was panicky enough to turn the city upside down on account of this. And then I'd like to slap everyone who's had a part in helping our culture become so scared that we jump at shadows.

And no matter what else comes of it, Boston's reputation as a cold and humorless city has been cemented. Great.

I can't help wondering what Dr. Weird would make of this. No, wait, I can imagine. It would involve corn. I'd like to stop imagining it now, please.

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Ah jeez, that's a rotten stunt. Myself, I feel bad for the police who had to deal with it.
Boston is supposed to be a cold and humorless city? Doesn't seem that way to me. On the other hand, I live in the New England countryside, where the wind is always north-north-east and children learn to walk on frozen toes, and where absolutely all of us are stingy (Official Management Term:"thrifty") and humorless (OMT:"stern and rockbound"). So I am not qualified to judge.

Well, all of New England had its sense of humor surgically removed, ya know. It's a tradeoff for the maple syrup.

Did these things actually look like plain old lighted signs? I couldn't figure that out from the news reports. Is this as silly as someone pointing to a flashing construction arrow and saying "Hey! I see wires sticking out of this thing!" (Because that would be a great way to disguise a bomb, making it look like a traffic light, eh?)

I must say, though, that their little promotion worked beyond their wildest dreams. Everybody's heard of ATHF by now. :)

The other question is, how can you make this into a short story? :P

Apparently I was wrong: the signs were not lit up when discovered, and no one was going to switch them on to see. So it took the a little while to see the Mooninite.

Oh, I've considered that. No plot yet, but the possibilities...

Oh, this simply must make it into a story somehow! Hee hee.

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Except that these signs were placed in nine other cities (including Los Angeles, which is definitely worried about terrorism), and Boston is the only one that flipped out.
Which makes me wonder what sort of communication error happened along the way here....

Maybe we just noticed first. Or we have a higher proportion of concerned grandmas.

I sure as hell hope we didn't notice first. It took us two weeks just to notice the deadly lightbrites, how long would it take us to notice something that someone was actually trying to hide???

Yeah...*that's* the part that scares me.

It may very well be that the problem here was simply location. Not location as in Boston versus Chicago or New York, but location as in that in Boston they were stuck under bridges and in T stations, and apparently not lit up, while in New York and Chicago and everywhere else they were hung in proper locations and turned on so that they looked more like what they were. I'm not saying I know that for a fact, but that may very well be the case.

If that's the case, it explains a lot. Blinky shiny things that are out in the open seem a little less worrying than blinky shiny things under bridges. Or maybe I'm just still paranoid.

Other police departments reported that there weren't as many of the things placed on bridges or near rail hubs in their cities. I also feel somewhat the way this columnist does vis a vis Boston getting egg on its face, as well as the arrest of the shmoes who threw the first egg, as it were.

Also, everyone loves to make fun of Tom Menino, but his temperament for flaring up in this situation (with lots of bark, he's our very own attack dog!) doesn't seem atypical for a local politician who identifies better with less trendy demographics (so, doesn't watch Adult Swim).

Agreed on the moron part. But I'm not sure he should spend five years in prison for being a moron. The people who funded the idea -- the PR people -- they're the ones who should have figured out that this wouldn't end well, and they should have their butts kicked repeatedly.

Five years in prison?! That's moronic. Jeez.

Plenty moronic for all!

I actually think the entire situation was ridiculous. If a bunch of signs with wires and batteries started randomly showing up mounted on high-traffic public places, I might mobilize security as well. The company was an idiot not to clear any of this with the city beforehand - normal advertisers have to buy their space from someone before they can plaster their stuff all over it. At least then, if people started freaking out, the mayor could have responded with actual knowledge.

It is sort of strange that Boston was the only place where any of this caused an uproar. I like to think it's because a lot fewer people here sit in front of the TV all day and thus didn't know who the cartoon character was, but that's just me. ;-)

Oh. Plus even if they knew who the character was, apparently you couldn't really see the lit up bulbs in the daylight, so the character wasn't very visible. This is just what I read in the paper though.

Ridiculous does seem to sum up most of the angles, yes.

I have to say, I was a lot more sympathetic to the city's position--especially since no one had gotten a permit to put up the signs--before the mayor starts railing that he's going to ask the FCC to pull TBS broadcasting license because they "made threats against the city."

Unless I'm missing something in the story. I mean, were they *trying* to make their signs look like bombs? Because yeah, that's grade-A stupid, I'll grant you.

Yeah, Menino's been kind of a dick about this. I'd like to see some hefty fines against TBS, but pulling their license? Prison time? No.

I'm going to employ some of my "analyst training" and throw a devil's advocate atcha: what would have been the public's reaction if the authorities HADN'T taken this seriously and it had turned out to be the real thing?

Panic and fury, probably, along with a lot of glee from jerks who think it'd be just what librul Massachusetts deserves. I think what bothers me is in part the reaction after it was learned these were harmless -- the media circus, the arrests, etc.

And in all honesty, I don't see how this is a devil's advocate. I already said I had mixed feelings, and I continue to have them.

...to quote Neil Gaiman with a bit of censorial spin.

I can't tell who I feel worse for in this situation-- the ill-advised marketing execs who strapped blinking devices to subway stations, or the harassed police who were actually trying to protect us and just never had the pleasure of watching ATHF. Every couple of seconds I switch to being a part of the culture of fear, and then back to part of the culture that mocks it.

But still, two weeks? We're completely screwed. No one's going to plant a shiny, blinking bomb on the subway and then wait two weeks to detonate it.

On the moon we have evolved beyond the need for Homeland Security.

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we have reprogrammed reality